I opened the cabinet where most of my crystals are housed and my eyes fixed on a small Herderite pendant. It has a small Herkimer diamond on its face and thin silver wire wraps the entire piece in rather unobtrusive ways. It is quite a powerful little crystal and I know that when it shows up it has come to help me examine the ways in which I use my thoughts and the actions attached to those thoughts. This tiny crystal comes to remind me of how these very thoughts affect our world. Yes, my seemingly innocuous thoughts are so powerful that they can cross oceans, yet affect my neighbors, my circle of people and all I see, hear and touch.

I had spent the day meditating, chanting, fasting, reading, resting, walking and carrying out each activity with complete presence. At day’s end I started doodling in one of my beautiful sketchbooks.  I had no product in mind.  

I allowed the colored pencils to come into my hands and land on the page. At some point, I seemed to hear a faint sound playing music I did not recognize. I allowed the sound to envelop me. I said hello and gently bided it good-bye. I felt happy, so free, so full…I continued allowing the pencils to carry the moment until I fell asleep.


Startled upon waking, I looked at the picture. It was my face, but the eyes! On the right, there was clearly a face. The left side, seen by itself appeared flatter, as if it was receding and blending into the openness; not clearly defined. When I covered the right side, I saw a pretty hummingbird filled with light. The joined halves appear on fire, yet the lips are calm, relaxed. The forehead shows a very busy third eye. Overall the face is not quite human, neither quite wild. There is brilliance and calmness.

Is this what oneness with Spirit looks and feels like? Ahhh… “the peace that comes from understanding”, as Eckhart Tolle writes. I reflect on the perfection of this moment, this life and this journey. And as I peer into each eye, and feel the warmth turned pure light around them, I notice beyond the flames, the growth that has come when I let go of thoughts, behaviors and beliefs that no longer serve me. As I release any lingering fears and embrace uncertainty, I feel the rush of pure love fluttering around me, deeply touching me…and I begin to understand intimacy with Spirit for it is Within Me. We are equal. We cannot function without the other. Spirit is the “wind beneath my wings”, and I am Spirit’s only form. I came uniquely packaged to bring forth Spirit’s message of healing, acceptance, love, joy, peace and harmony. I am uniquely built to experience the heart-mind that Buddha taught. I can do my job well, practice compassion toward myself and my journey and see also the perfection of my companions’ journeys.

If I didn’t learn to live intimately with Spirit, I would not have learned to love and appreciate my gifts and talents. I would not believe that those who love me do so as deeply as they are capable of, and that it is OK. I would not have learned as much as I do from them and be grateful for my lessons. Ultimately, had I not learned to be intimate with Spirit, I would not have recognized my power to learn from each bump on the road, new and important things about my job in this earthly dimension.

Spirit cannot fight wars, famine, poverty, sadness, anger, or attachments. Spirit can whisper, blow wind. I can fight wars, famine, poverty…by facing and healing the wars within me; the hunger within me; the scarcity within me, the pain within me.  I can change anger to love when I see the ego seeking love outside of myself.

As I become the wind, Spirit becomes the water that carries the vibration of healing to touch all points in this dimension; in this Earth plane. When I merge with Spirit I find love, abundance, happiness, peace, contentment, and I create Heaven on Earth. When I step up and stop procrastinating, embrace my fears and get on to my path of service doing what I love, I observe the brilliance of it spill all around me. Now I can rightfully claim that Spirit Is Within Me. Then I simply receive the essence of what I give… I see how these very thoughts affect our world. Yes, my seemingly innocuous thoughts are so powerful that they can cross oceans, yet affect my neighbors, my circle of people and all I see, hear and touch!

Yesterday I told some friends that I was having a feeling of impending happiness. They laughed. Today I saw a beautiful double rainbow. I saw happiness kiss me right in the face!




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