The day I created this piece I was meditating on the trajectory I traveled as an artist since the tender age of 9 or 10. I saw how many times I restarted it and I peered on the instances when my impulse to speak visually, just melded with something else that felt “artsy”. I observed how I allowed this powerful force to become thwarted and buried at times. Given my present resolve to fully unleash it and learn, I marvel that time has not mummified my skills. I regale at the ease with which I can still dive into “the zone” without any need to come up for air, accepting cheerfully what shows up and emerge from a painting session as if I had awakened from a peaceful sleep. So at the end of the meditation, I went into the studio and looked around.
This looking around allows my body to react to textures and my senses to linger on colors and shapes. As I write now, it is hard to recall exactly how I go about deciding what to use, in terms of media and ground. Can I say…it just happens? The trust implied in this “just happens” is actually quite empowering and it is a feeling I endeavor to duplicate in all areas of my life. However, it doesn’t always happen. By looking at the choices I made on that day, I can see this theme’s presence on the painting.
A richly patterned background-the world around us?, holds a multi-dimensional red and gold vibrant form. The background and the form interact in several places as a few recognizable shapes become visible. A seemingly frustrated figure seats on a low bench contemplating a bright red crystal-her gifts? The hands holding the crystal seem connected to a stream that moves within the larger shape-her connection to Source? There is a brilliant bird-the extraordinary view from above? But this bird is midway up the stream and caught in a downward flow. Can this represent bringing the higher view down to Earth?
It looks as though the bird swam from above, where a butterfly, a fish and other living beings are part of a transformational wave that seem to emerge from the anthropomorphic shape. The stream splits right below the bird and it appears to wrap around the seated figure-her inspiration? Just outside this flow, there are some hearts and a fiery yet calm face is looking ahead, away from the seated figure. The sad being does not see them. She is consumed with her gifts and the quandary of how best to use them. She cannot even see how they are interconnected to the larger form-Spirit? God? She does not allow herself to see the rich tapestry that exists in the world. She is fully entrapped in the workings of the ego mind.
The painting expresses the ability or lack thereof to acknowledge one’s worth, talents, and skills. Deeply embedded within Spirit’s wave, the figure seems to know that she is “connected”, yet she is not looking up. She chooses suffering. Her pain is directed inward, and it’s borne from her perceived inability to diligently carry out Spirit’s guidance. She understands that she is here on Earth to learn about self-love and appreciation of the gifts she brought. She also knows that these gifts have to be given away, yet wonders who would want them. She is ashamed to have craved love from outside herself and taken Spirit’s love for granted. Caught in the egoic mind, the most rewarding experiences inherent in her creative sessions became a sort of punishment and she stopped, buried the gifts, and appeared content with life as it was.
One day she became aware that her gifts were taking up oppressive space in her subconscious. The urge to paint became excruciatingly painful. She had to yield and in the act, she became happier, softer, and kinder. The woman knew that it was Spirit –Within; the seed of the All that was clamoring to be freed. Yet she fought it, but this time she felt the very bosom of Divinity above her head, showering the golden milk of love. It was a love she could not ignore and that is how she became grateful for her experiences, her gifts, her mind, her family and friends. She became in love with her life, just the way it is.
It was then that she noticed all the red around it. Red for passion, red of the heart, the hearts of love. She reached out to pick up the new head and placed it up above her shoulders. She looked at the jewel in her hand and saw it as the real power. It was the power to design her life and spread the wisdom and beauty she brings from Spirit for all to have. The figure realized that she was the I AM THAT I AM and that it was time to let go of perceptions borne in the mind that colored her life with the wrong hues. She began to love the dark and the light and allowed the universal energy to penetrate her core. She forgave herself for allowing others to oppress her. She let go of the past, went back into the studio, painted a masterpiece and smiled. It just happened…Spirit was freed!
The artwork is available for closer view and purchase @ www.lidiascherart.com/Newworks, just in time to help you notice your own gifts before turning the page to 2014.